Monday, January 19, 2009

Has It Come To This?

Had it really come to this? Was the Lord actually going to allow this to happen?
Maybe He wasn't paying attention.

I waited a few minutes.

A phone call? A knock on the door? Anything to interrupt this fateful moment.....Nothing.

I let out a sigh of defeat. Fine! If this is how it's gonna be, fine. My finger hovered over the mouse button. I glared at the "submit" button with all the hatred I could muster. I finally clicked.

Thank You For Joining Christian Singles.Com!

I cringed. What are they so excited about? Do they realize this is not a proud moment in my life? I would consider myself under duress. My love life had been pitifully reduced to this.

I stared at the screen, letting the reality of the situation sink in. Isn't it a little against my faith to join a dating website? Should Christians even offer such a thing? I mean isn't it like taking our lives into our own hands? I feel like I'm saying: "Well, Lord, you're taking way too long. Besides I don't really think you know what I'm looking for. But thanks for trying anyway!" I suppose He can work through the internet just as well.

If it counted for anything, my heart wasn't really in it. I thought about how I'd always wanted a fun, cute, romantic "How We Met" story. Something about bumping into him at the grocery store, or meeting in line at the bank. Or sitting next to each other on a plane (I don't travel, but it could happen!). I thought about how my story would go, should this website attempt turn out successful.: "I uploaded my pic, he uploaded his, we nudged each other, next thing you know,we directly connected. It was love at first click!"

Blech. Yeah, that's really romantic, for a couple of robots. I thought my story would be much more romantic and have a lot more intrigue and life to it.

I looked at the mirror. I'm not bad-looking, I have good hygiene, I make a decent living. How did I end up on ChristianSingles.com? At 25 years old, in the Christian community, I am considered an Old Maid! A spinster whose chance at marriage is slipping away with every breath I take.

I couldn't bear to look at the welcome screen any longer, so I decided to check my Facebook. Bad idea. Another person has added wedding photos. Maybe going to a Christian college wasn't such a good idea. Now, more than half of the people in my graduating class were either married, engaged or in a serious relationship headed in that direction. This couldn't possibly be normal. My non-Christian friends weren't even thinking about getting marriage. They were busy being young and starting careers. I would love to jump on that bandwagon, the only problem is, even as I sit here, all the eligible, Christian men my age, were being grabbed up like field mice. I wouldn't mind waiting until I am 30 so much if Ithought there would be anyone left.

I know what you're thinking "this is not the talk of a faithful woman of God." If you're thinking that, you're probably already married...